Does it have the full link pack? If no then the activation key refers to that, I believe, Bluetooth should work though
As above. Tech pack didn't include Full Link activation when I got mine last year and had to specify it. Your dealer may simply have not activated it TrishaM.
When you plug your phone in for the first time you should get this msg onscreen
"
Apple CarPlay. New Device detected. would you like to connect with Apple CarPlay?"
Click "connect", then you'll need to enter your unlock code or use the fingerprint unlock, it prompts you to do this.
The Phone will then ask if you want to "Allow AirPlay, CarPlay whilst phone is locked"...Allow.
That should be it.
I use an iPhone 6s with mine, no need to use BlueTooth, although some non-Apple cables can be a bit unreliable. IIRC you can check the cable compatibility by plugging in the phone and then pressing
Media button on the infotainment display, if the car is seeing the phone then you'll be able to select your music from there as it will see your phone as a USB device.
Welcome to the forum and hope you get it sorted quickly, let us know how you get on.