Well, I'm certainly no expert. But i had read a lot on golf and tiguan forums about the steady red light appearing when the car is waiting for scheduled charging to start, and this correlating to flat batteries. There are too many reports of this for me to feel comfortable testing it and calling out VW rescue in the morning or having my alarm go off! I guess the issue potentially arises when the delay (hence red light and, presumably, 12v battery drain) is lengthy.
Set to max is an option that appears on my Ohme app when I plug in. Basically, it's just asking the charger to override any schedule and charge the car fully. When I do this, it then offers an option to switch to Smart mode - which picks up the off-peak schedule that I have set. Toggling it like this then turns off the charger so that no lights appear on the car's charge port after a minute or two, which I understand is how things should be when dormant, until charging starts at midnight. I'd set the golf's charge limit to 80% on the infotainment screen, and also on the Ohme app. I don't think there is anything else I can do via the infotainment screen - at least, until the long-awaited software "fix" to add scheduling becomes available.
Re charge rate - I seem to be getting around 7kw which is about where it should be with the Ohme home pro I think. Yours does seem low. It took 2 hr 35mins to add 17kw.