Wiper module (J400) and alarm siren (H12) are on neighbouring pins on the same BCM plug (Pins T46b 30 and 31 respectively) which is the smaller middle plug, for when you gain access to the BCM.
Side note, it helps if you have the hands of a 10 year old girl to get decent finger access to the plugs LOL
As above, the BCM holds Component Protection (CP), key data for remote central locking and controls a whole host of things on the car which some likely won't work properly without the correct parameters loaded. Genuine ODIS with authorised online access is your best friend for this.
I am not familiar with OBD11 (and it's ilk) but if it has similar functions and features as VCDS then I'd check the output from the wiper stalk and try and trigger the wipers from the diagnostic tool just to confirm everything outside of the wiper motor is correct as it's a 10 second job and adds verification that the problem is the motor end.
I'd also test for power at pin1 (Red/White wire) on the plug at the wiper motor end of the loom. Even though the "No Comms" fault codes are pretty solid lines of investigation to follow, always best to cover all avenues before parts swapping.
Thanks for the help.
How difficult is it to get to the BCM to have a look at the plugs you mentioned?
Outside air temp is reporting its 41c - obviously wrong. Is that related I wonder to the BCM?
OBD11 has some output tests I can do, the app wan't £70 for the privilege of doing such things, which is a bit steep.
At the moment, my options are:
1. Buy a single channel scope and hope its a cable somewhere obvious
2. Strip interior to get to BCM and hope its something obvious and not a dead BCM
3. Leave it and take it to the garage on Saturday for them to diagnose and resolve (They're doing an oil change, too)
The OB11 tool doesn't give live data for the stalk position.